Why You Shouldn't Cut Your Hair After Baby

Hey folks. Wanna know why I haven't posted in awhile? B/c I've been in hiding.

Remember my long locks?

Well, 2 weeks ago in a moment of despair while trying to glue down the baby hair halo, I decided I was going to get it cut. I went on Pinterest and pinned all these awesome hair cuts. See?

They are super cute, right? So I go to my stylist and show her these pictures and tell her: "I need to be able to wear it curly. I need to be able to put it in a ponytail. I don't want a "mom" cut. I want something fun and modern." She said "Got it!" 

SHE LIED.

When I tell you that I paid for the horrendous cut and ran out of there like my ass was on fire, I am not kidding you. I knew I was going to start bawling and I couldn't bring myself to doing it there because then she'd want to fix it. And I didn't want her to come near me or my hair EVER AGAIN.

Wanna see the damage? I'm warning you. It ain't pretty.

Why is that scribbly heart over my face? Oh, because I had been crying like someone told me unicorns don't really exist for TWO HOURS. I may or may not have scared Serg and Sebastian with the tears. I may or may not have sobbed "I CUT OFF THE LAST FUN PART OF ME!"

WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT? WHAT. THE. FUCK. IS. THAT.

The next morning I woke up puffy eyed and was desperate for a solution. I tried the curling wand.

Ok, not terrible. A definite improvement. So I wore my hair like this for 2 days and burned most of my fingerprints off in the process.

Then I had to wash my hair and blow dry it myself.
Well. Now I look like I'm wearing a hair lampshade. Shall we say, "what the fuck is that", again?

Obviously, I can not wear this pyramid hair curly. AUGH. Panic starts to set in and I decide that I need to go back to my old stylist who is 40 minutes away. HE CAN SAVE ME.

And he did. For $75. His first words as he examined my butchered head: "What the fuck, Renata! Did you go to Super Cuts?!"

Still not what I originally wanted but 390482095840 times better. He told me he "did what he could around the massacre". Seriously.

Plus side? For the first time ever I think I really love my hair curly more than straight!

Lesson learned. Never cutting my hair again.


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